That phone call – the one I’ve played over and over again – was the kind you get while washing dishes, microwaving kid’s food and juggling, well, everything.
You know the genre: “Date of birth?” Address ?
The house opposite was for sale and we were impatient, but had to renew our mortgage pre-approval which had expired a day earlier.
I went through the answers: no, our income had not changed; no, we didn’t have a new credit card, and then this, “Didn’t you get pregnant?”
There was a pause, it was like forever as I quickly thought about what to say.
“Sorry, I have to…” jumps Tracey, the mortgage specialist at ING. At the same time, I decide to let it slip that I had just had a baby, our second child.
Tracey didn’t have to ask and in fact it’s against the law to ask, but more on that later.
In the days that followed I convinced myself that I had exaggerated the conversation that followed, that my memory was foggy from, well, you know, said baby.
So I asked the bank for a copy of the recording and it’s worse than I remember.
“We do not accept maternity leave”
“I had a baby, but my job status hasn’t changed, I’m on the same pay,” I hear myself running out.
I think I already knew what was going to happen.
“We can’t accept your earnings while you’re on maternity leave,” she tells me, just like that.
I speak slowly, confused, when I say it again, “you cannot accept my income. Why?”
“No, because we do not accept maternity leave.”
Tracey explains that ING only accepts maternity leave as income from a woman if she returns to work within three months.
I’m not. I am fortunate to have 16 weeks of paid leave from my work at ABC and after that I will claim parental benefit from Centrelink.
She continues, “The reason we don’t take maternity leave… is because some moms decide ‘no, I don’t think I can go back to work’.”
I can hear how shocked I look, in part because she says it out loud.
I push back, “it’s 2021… it’s over… my husband could decide to quit his job, what’s the difference?” and Tracey looks really a little likable.
“I understand, honestly. Unfortunately, I don’t write the rules, I just have to follow them.”
Three months earlier, ING had pre-approved the exact same loan and now, with the addition of a little scream, we have suddenly faced a setback.
A delicate situation to navigate
The Human Rights Commission is pretty clear on this.
“It is illegal to ask for information as to whether a person is pregnant or intends to become pregnant,” he told me in a statement.
“Suppliers of goods and services should not discriminate against their customers on the basis of pregnancy or potential pregnancy. “
ING is not the only institution to reject women on maternity leave, even if the others do not articulate a “policy” so brazenly and straightforward.
We quickly enlisted the help of our friend Jonathan Kline-Spink, the director of Market Street Finance, to see if we could find a non-discriminatory lender.
He succeeded, but to say it was difficult is an understatement.
He deals with all the major banks and scans their policies.
“Getting funding while on maternity leave can be difficult,” he told me.
“Each bank has its own policy for verifying maternity leave income and they vary a lot.”
Katherine Temple of the Consumer Action Law Center agrees it’s a tricky situation to navigate.
“By the letter of the law, being pregnant or on maternity leave shouldn’t affect your mortgage application, what matters is whether you can repay the loan,” she told me. .
And she says it’s something that banks are legally required to verify.
“If you do not disclose upcoming changes in your income or expenses, for example, if you are planning to take a period of unpaid parental leave, it could affect your ability to claim compensation against the lender by along the way if you find the loan to be unaffordable.
“But what matters is your financial situation, not just whether you’re pregnant or on maternity leave.”
A bank reshuffle
ING says it’s an upheaval since I filed a complaint with the bank.
“The information given to you over the phone was inappropriate and not correct,” he said in a statement.
“As a precaution, we launched training for all of our mortgage specialists promptly after receiving your complaint to make sure they are all clear about our parental leave policy for loan seekers.
“ING takes into account loan requests from parents or caregivers on parental leave …
“We look at applicants’ income and expenses at the time of application, their arrangements with their employer to return to work, and any known impact on their income, such as a reduction in pay. “
As I listen to the call one last time, I hear myself go from being overly polite and grateful for Tracey for explaining everything, to shocked and frustrated.
And that’s still how I feel.
I’m incredibly grateful that our budget remains relatively unscathed and grateful that we can make this choice to spend time with our kids when I know a lot of other parents can’t.
But it is frustrating. This is what happened to my mother in the 90s, when the banks turned down her mortgage applications because, what a horror, she was a single mother.
And now we are there, 25 years later.
Fast forward another quarter of a century, and I wonder what the experience will be like for my new daughter?